Us vs. Them

It is 2012, another election year.  Time for all of the political discussion (arguments) and the not-so-sweet TV advertisements to come rolling across the screen with the little tagline at the end "this was a paid advertisement by the so-and-so campaign." In an election year, like one we have this year, it is easy to see how polarizing our nation can be.  Not only our nation, but our entire world community can take sides, perhaps not always politically, but we as a human race can become polarizing over certain issues nonetheless.  This is a very dangerous place to be.  We align ourselves with a certain group, or a certain party, or a certain person and before long we find ourselves in a me vs. you stance or us vs. them, red vs. blue, android vs. apple, republican vs. democrat, Marvel vs. DC, Christians vs. non-Christians.  The questions I ask myself are: how healthy is this?  Are we accomplishing anything? Can we accomplish more another way?

Oftentimes I think the Christian community, who has great intentions, gets wrapped up in this me vs. you way of life as well.  We are taught that this is the way we settle things verbally and peacefully (sometimes not so peacefully, like the Crusades--sorry).  I present my case, you present your case, we challenge one another's views, and walk away with nobody being swayed and everyone being angry.  Some people just love a good debate.  This week is the first presidential debate of the 2012 elections.  I will certainly be paying attention, not because I think either of the political leaders will dramatically sway my opinion with their carefully crafted debate skills, or their attacks and counter-attacks against the other party/leader.  But I will take note of the character presented by each of the candidates.

There will certainly be many things to discuss and there will be much politicking taking place, but let me get back to my original thought.  We, as Christians, often see ourselves in the arena of me vs. those who oppose me.  We take a stand on the words of Christ from Mark 9:40 "whoever is not against us is for us" and assume that the opposite is true: "whoever is not for us is against us."  Our Christian stances hold our line on several hot button issues and lump together those who deviate from our opinion.  I use the term "our" because I fall into this category often without meaning to.  But, what may be more beneficial is to remind ourselves that the other political party (whichever that may be for you), the opposing viewpoint, the anti-my-way-of-thinking, is not our enemy.  No matter how anti-Christian that person may seem.  They are not the enemy.  Unless they are the physical embodiment of evil they are not the enemy.

How can that be?  Am I just some passive Christian who has been brainwashed by the liberal media to affirm that there is no moral absolute or that all truth is relative? No.  I am trying to remind us as Christians that our battle is not against flesh and blood. "For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms." -Eph 6:12.

Although I quiver at the thought of how downright evil some people's actions can be, and how much insanity there is in the world, we are all sinners and even the scariest human is only one step away from the grace of God (yes all, even the most extreme cases).  If we change our outlook, we should never see our struggle as a we vs. they mentality.  The ones we consider "they" in this sentence are people just like anyone included in the "we" category, and the act of the cross, Jesus Christ's death, burial, and resurrection is for every person.  We are on level ground with everyone.  People who are not yet believers don't need to hear our condemnation or theological reasons for how Christians perceive "them." What they need to hear is how a loving Christ came to establish a relationship with all of humanity and how "us" flawed humans who call ourselves the Church want to reach out to the hurting, poor, lonely, destitute, helpless, and hungry with that love.  Ivory tower arguments hardly convince anyone into the Kingdom of Heaven, but Love is different, Love is where it all began.

Let us reframe the us vs. them mentality to a we-all-together-need-Christ's-love mentality.  Let me show you by my actions, even if we never believe the same.  People get turned away from those who tend to say their view is wrong.  I know what many Christians will say next: "Christ is the only way, and yes to deny that is to be wrong."  I am not trying to refute what Christ says about himself, I am trying to encourage those who believe to embody Christ's attitude of humility and not to put ourselves in the place of the Holy Spirit.  God is big enough to convict others of their sin, He's big enough to convict us of our own.

If I muddied this up, please feel free to sit down at the table and have a cup of coffee with me, and we can talk.  If you want some more from this perspective try reading Finding Common Ground by Timothy Downs who does a much better job than I have about laying these kinds of foundations.

Why Being a Dad is Awesome!

There are many reasons to love being a dad. I am not the first to experience this nor will I be the last, but are some things I must tell you about why being a dad is so awesome.

1. You get to sing songs about everyday things.
I think I'll stick to my day job, but at night I become a lyrical genius. Sure, The words don't always rhyme and the melodies begin to all mesh together, but that doesn't stop my six month old from smiling when she hears her daddy singing.  It may be a song about how "we gotta dry the baby" or "daddy's gonna carry you to mommy" or just our daughter's name with some fun "hey hey hey's" thrown in every now and then.  The point is that she likes it. Who knows, maybe some day she will begin to sing and create some actual songs of her own.

2. I watch less TV now.
I know what some of you are thinking. "That is the opposite of more awesome." But, let's face the facts. I probably watched a little too much TV to start with. For example, I knew the whistling tune that played in the background when the morning news program showed the school lunch menu and I didn't even have school-aged kids.  Or I could quote whole commercials for you even though we have a DVR and skip through a lot of them.

Also, there's not really that much quality programming on when you think about it. Oh sure, it's entertaining but it's not really quality television.  When people tune in each week to see how some guy or girl is going to narrow down the competitors of potentional spouses (ala The Bachelor or The Bachelorette) something's a little wrong with our definition of "quality." Then we get surprised when we see in the checkout line magazines that they are divorced a couple years later. Or we watch a compelling drama about a plagued world that has had a virus introduced turning people into zombies and the rest of the living into monster that will do anything to keep their families alive (The Walking Dead). Plenty entertaining, but probably not the best use of hours of my time.

You may see it different than I do but the point is now I spend less time watching TV and more time on the floor, playing, or giving my child a bath, or reading a story. And I love it.

3. I smile a lot more.
I'd like to start off by saying I don't think of myself a "frowny" person to begin with. I love to laugh. I enjoy smiling. I enjoy making other people smile too. But, next to my wife there's no one else that I enjoy making smile more than our precious little baby.  Maybe it's because she has the cutest smile ever (I know everyone thinks that about their own child but our's really does, just ask my wife). Or maybe it's because I know what makes her giggle. Whatever it is, she smiles and it just starts a chain reaction. I will then smile and then I'm hooked.  I have to keep the cycle going.  I try to make her laugh or smile which then makes me smile, rinse and repeat.

I'm sure there's a scientific explanation about how there are endorphins release in the pleasure center of the brain when this happens and it's like being addicted to a drug, because I would believe it. I like to see her smiling and the only response I can have is to smile back.  She makes me smile more.

4. You get to teach your child about everything.
This is one that is yet to reach it's potential. My six month old didn't really understand any of the words that came out of my mouth when I was giving her a history lesson the other day.  That doesn't mean I should stop teaching her.  No, someday she will hear. Then she will begin to ask more questions like "why" or "what for" or "how come..."  We need to be prepared to answer her.

Long before our baby was born, my wife and I were driving in the car to see my in-laws.  We passed an oddly shaped building and I turned and faced my wife and asked "what's that?"  She shrugged her shoulders and said she didn't know.  I told her "sorry, that's the wrong answer.  When we have kids you gotta be able to at least make stuff up."  I'm not proposing that we lie to our children, but I doubt that our inquiring little red head will be satisfied simply with "I don't know."

So, I will continue to give her lessons on life even this young, by all means she might catch on some day when I am rambling on about quad-core processors, coffee grind consistency, and especially the loving nature of our God.  It's this last part that makes me so excited.  She will hear what we are talking about.  I pray that what she hears is the sweetness of the Gospel from our lips.  "Start children off in the way they should go, and when they are old they will not turn from it." (Proverbs 22:6) So, whether she is a movie buff or history buff means little to me as long as she catches from us who God is and God loves us.

5. I feel like I know more about my Heavenly Father.
The last reason why being a dad is so awesome is that I now feel I have a better understanding of God as Father.  It is an interesting perspective to consider what it must have been like for God to send his son Jesus to earth for our benefit.  I can now relate better to that Father.  What?  Am I saying that could sacrifice my own child for people who don't deserve it, for people who may never reciprocate?  That is some kind of love.  I know that I don't inherently have the kind of love it takes to make that happen.  But, because Christ is transforming me more into to his likeness, I am getting closer.

I spend time with my child, not out of duty or obligation, but because it truly brings me delight.  I believe this is the same with our Heavenly Father.  He delights in spending time with us.  The Bible is full of how he cares for us, and has "lavished his love on us, so that we might be his children" (1 John 3:1).  Think about that for a second.  Let it sink in. The Father of creation loved us more than we could ever love Him in return. If it wasn't for his love, we would not even know love.  "We love because he first loved us." (1 John 4:19). God's action toward humanity is where it all began.  Our love pales in comparison to the one who created us.  I know my daughter loves me. Even at six months, I see how she lights up when her mother or I come into the room, but she may not know until she has children of her own some day how much a parent loves their child.

So, when I see my little daughter and how she smiles and it makes my heart melt a little, I can't help but think of how the Father must feel when he delights in his children (and that's who we are if our faith is in Jesus Christ - John 1:12; Romans 8:14; 9:8; Galatians 3:26).  That God would do anything for us, and has already done everything we need.  Even though I love my child, I love with an imperfect love, but God loves with a perfect love and I can't wait to share that with my child.